Separation is likely the hardest process you will ever go through. The heartache of battling with your former spouse about your children and your property that you accumulated together is absolutely gutwrenching. The idea of someone telling you what time you can see your children that you raised together and imposing restrictions on your time with them can be too much to bear. One of counsel’s duties is to manage expectations of our clients. Judges remind us of this all the time. They tell us that we are to remind our client’s of the possibility of success and sometimes are the bearer of bad news. This can result in us coming across as harsh, insensitive and difficult. Clients who hear bad news that their case isn’t strong or fraught with imperfections can take it personally as an attack on their own parenting. However, in family law, there are no winners. They say that when both parties leave court feeling deflated as if they have both lost, then that is a family who has won. That is because the hands have been dealt evenly so no one feels as if they are the pure winners. It is imperative that you take instructions from your lawyer and understand that if they sound harsh or insensitive it is not because they are, but it is because we have a duty to manage expectations. I believe I understand the divorce process very clearly. I don’t want my client to walk out of court feeling deflated with expectations that they were never told of. It is imperative that the client is told whether their position is reasonable and what evidence is required to convince a court.
Make sure you engage in open and honest discussions with your lawyer about how to navigate through your case.
